Twas The Days Before Christmas


“Twas the days before Christmas, when all through the Lower House
All the Representatives were stirring, headed by Neil Tupas.
The impeachment was introduced by the Majority with dare,
In hopes that the Chief Justice would soon be out of their hair.

The Congressmen were nestled all quick with their pens,
While visions of pork barrel danced in their heads.
And the Senators in their judicial robes, and Pnoy’s happy clap,
Had just settled their brains for a long impeachment rap.”

Christmas is nearing. The big day is just around the corner, but still a lot of troubling events are happening within our country. Let us take a look at some of these, but a fair warning because you may not be pleased.

Christmas Ceasefire

PNoy approved a unilateral 18-day ceasefire or suspension of military offensives with the New People’s Army (NPA). Newly installed Armed Forces of the Philippines (AFP) chief of staff Lieutenant General Jessie Dellosa said “This is to give our brothers and sisters who have gone the wrong path, a chance to celebrate Christmas and bond with their families and loved ones peacefully”.

Meanwhile, SC Chief Justice Renato Corona wishes DOJ Secretary Laila De Lima would also declare a ceasfire on him. De Lima lashed back at Corona for calling PNoy constant criticisms against the judiciary tantamount to a looming dictatorship. She called Corona a “Walking Constitutional Violation”.

Miriam Defensor Santiago was also reported beating the DSWD Secretary Jinkee Soliman with several questions regarding her shared beliefs with the Black and White Movement turning the Secretary to Black and Blue, but still Yellow on the highlights.

While Pasay RTC Judge Jesus Mupas threatens to cite former Comelec Chief Abalos for contempt over accusations of asking for bribe.

Former actress Nadia Montenegro however was glad she didn’t have to request for a similar ceasefire order against Annabelle Rama as the latter had stopped sending her offensive tweets over the Twitter universe already.

 

Crispylicious Thrills

The Central bank of then Philippines assured the Filipino people that there would be plenty of “crispy” peso bills available for the Christmas season.

It’s the season for potential overindulgement over food, drinks, and spending. We have to watch it. I wonder if there would also be plenty of crispy “patas” and crispy “balat ng lechons” to partake at Noche Buena and Media Noche. If not I would just settle for the more affordable Crispylicious Chickenjoy or Crispy Fries of the big bee named Jollibee.

If only I had more of those “crispies” from the Central Bank, I wouldn’t be wondering at all.

Meanwhile everyone is still talking about the equally “crispy” or “malulutong na mga salitang binitawan ni Corona” as he pledged to block a supposed plan of PNoy to become a dictator, saying that the country’s incumbent leader wanted to oust him so that he can appoint a puppet court and control all branches of the government.

“They said that I should not have accepted the appointment. Why, so that Mr. Aquino would be able to appoint his own Chief Justice, whom he could hold by the neck!” Corona said.

 

Hamon ng TV Patrol Poll

ABS-CBN’s TV Patrol Poll asked the Filipino people last Friday night “Kumpleto ba ang Pasko ng Pinoy kung walang hamon?”

They maybe touching on the poverty angle, but hey let me reinvent the question for them to make it a little more interesting: “Kumpleto ba ang Pasko ni Pnoy kung hinamon din niya si Chief Justice Renato Corona ng umbagan?”

What do you think? Text A if “Yes” and B if “No” and send it to 2366.

TV Patrol new year’s resolution: Learn how to write poll questions and understand the value of doing surveys.

 

Flash Forward

Typhoon Sendong devastated Cagayan De Oro and Iligan with flashfloods. Reports coming in are saying several people are already confirmed dead and missing. Iligan City Mayor Lawrence Cruz reported that the number of casualties still increases as more dead bodies are recovered..

So sad because it’s just a few days before Christmas. How very cruel of circumstances when a few days ago, the residents of Better Living, Paranaque lost their lives and possessions due to a fire brought about by the  sudden  crash of a Queen-type aircraft, while the Northern Mindanao residents are now battling the water element of Mother Nature.

Everything happened so fast, it was difficult to avoid the disasters.

But apparently both disasters still didn’t beat the speed record of the Corona Impeachment signing at the House of Representatives. Supreme Court Administrator Midas Marquez even said it was “lightning-like”.

 

Losing The Crown

Pnoy answers the question: “Kamusta love life ngayong Pasko?” – “Postponed until further notice. Updates will be posted once the Corona impeachment trial is over.” Reports said that PNoy is too preoccupied with the nearing Chief Justice’s impeachment trial. Malacanang also reported that PNoy was further devastated upon learning that the basketball team of Ateneo, his college alma mater, loss to San Sebastian.

Defending 4-time UAAP champion Ateneo Blue Eagles was dethroned by San Sebastian Stags, 73-67 during the Philippine Collegiate Champions League.

“I wish we lost a  different crown instead!” says Aquino.

Iwasto Ang Kasaysayan

Senator Chiz Escudero aims to have the late actor Fernando Poe Jr. recognized as the 2004 Presidential polls winner if proven so. Escudero will gather sufficient evidence from the Senate Blue Ribbon committee’s investigation that would prove the movie star did win against former President Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo.”

“Iwasto ang Kasaysayan – yun lang ang aming hiling, for my father to be recognized as the real winner of the Presidency” says Grace Poe Llamanzares, FPJ’s daughter.

Meanwhile, Joanna Rose Bacosa, the mother of Manny Pacquiao’s love child resurfaces and is again in the news. According to Bacosa, she just wanted Manny Pacquiao to recognize and allow her son to carry his family name.

So, both parties just wants some form of recognition, similarly Pnoy also wants to let the public recognize his singing skills as he sings for the second time Freddie Aguilar’s  “Estudyante Blues”. First during his Victory Party when he won the Presidency, and then during the Christmas Party of the House of Representatives.

“Maybe Anne Curtis would invite me to sing in her upcoming Concert in January, after all we both have been victorious recently.” Says Pnoy

To which he let out a resounding poem:

“Her movie “No Other Woman” was a big hit and top-grosser,
while the TRO didn’t stood a chance against our Watchlist Order
She got a Platinum record for her  first solo album “Annebisyosa”
While Pasay RTC Warrant of Arrest was able to detain the” little girl” called Gloria
Now She’s having her first major “No Other Concert” at the Araneta
While similarly in January we’ll be holding an “Impeachment Trial” for Corona.
Hahaha!”

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